This Life II Read online

  In my purse, I had one of the items Shannon had told me was mine now. Grace would’ve wanted me to have it, he’d said. And her day planner worked like a bandage or a fake memory; I got insights into her daily life and everything she did for the syndicate.

  The woman had notes on everyone. Allergies, injuries, reminders, names, dates, favorites, dislikes—the lists went on.

  One of the guys was quick to open the door for me, which was another thing I was going to accept. As per Grace’s advice. We were to be helpful and nurturing, but we should never let the men forget who they were protecting. Who they worked for. And I was Finnegan’s wife. That meant there would always be someone to open doors for me, carry my luggage, run my errands, and do my bidding.

  I had to accept it with a smile. No more of that “Oh, you don’t have to” shyness.

  “Thank you.” I stepped out of the SUV with my purse and cocked my head at the tall guy in front of me. I was certain at this point—all the men in the Sons were skyscrapers. “Are you by any chance one of the Mikeys?”

  Liam had two men named Mikey on his crew. According to Grace’s planner, one of them had dietary restrictions due to allergies. She’d also noted what a pity it was that he’d covered his neck with a tattoo, like this guy right here.

  He looked at me with evident surprise. “Uh, yes, ma’am.”

  I nodded and shouldered my purse. “Come see me in the kitchen at some point, please. I was told you can’t eat everything.” Grace had written down eggs, strawberries, and something else. Her handwriting was perfect, but she’d also been an optimist. In the tiniest boxes, she’d crammed so much information, some was unreadable.

  “Em!”

  I whipped my head toward the wraparound porch, and I smiled wryly as Patrick and Conn jogged down the steps.

  “Your favorite brother-in-law is here.” Patrick widened his arms, ready for a hug.

  He was also my only brother-in-law… “That’s a bold statement,” I teased.

  He chuckled and gathered me in a tight hug. “Is Sarah in a good mood today?”

  Oh Christ. “You could ask her yourself, you know.”

  “That’s like entering a battlefield without protection.”

  I grinned and shook my head. I couldn’t say he was entirely wrong, because he wasn’t. While he and Sarah had grown a lot closer, my friend was…fickle. She could wake up in the morning hating the world, and Patrick took more hits than he deserved.

  “She missed you, but you didn’t hear that from me,” I said.

  “Fuck yes.” He trailed over to the other SUV.

  Alec and Nessa ran inside, yelling for Liam, and I glanced around to see if Finnegan was around. He’d stolen way too much from me. One day without him was a vacation. Two days were okay. After three, I was fidgety, miserable, and checking the time.

  I took a deep breath and glanced up at the house. It was beautiful here, and fall was upon us. The colors in the trees were shifting slowly toward yellow and red.

  There were actual rocking chairs on the porch.

  Nothing around us was painted or artificial. It was all wood, rich forest smells, and nature. I loved it.

  “Mrs. O’Shea, I’ll bring your bags to your room,” Mikey told me.

  “Okay, thank you.” I could find out later which room that was. I had more pressing matters to attend to. Such as learning who everyone was.

  Shan and Thomas stood by the other car, having a cigarette. There were some greetings; Colm and Luna had joined the guys who were at the barn, and I didn’t recognize a single soul from the wedding. Which didn’t mean they hadn’t been there. They most likely had.

  Well, my husband was nowhere to be seen, so…

  Viv walked over to me, and together, we headed up the steps and decided to start with the kitchen.

  “I doubt the boys have picked up groceries,” she muttered.

  “I was thinking I could put together an order online and have one of the guys pick it up,” I said. “Then no one can mess anything up.”

  She laughed softly. “Smart thinking.”

  The hallway had no furniture or pictures on the walls whatsoever, and it led to the living room on the right, kitchen on the left, and stairs going both up and down. Hadn’t Liam been here for a month already? Evidently, he didn’t care about furniture. There were a few couches, chairs, a coffee table, and a big flat screen in the living room, but that was it. No entertainment center, no shelves, no clutter. He could use some more light in there.

  The kitchen was pretty empty too, aside from four high-back chairs around the kitchen island. As I spotted four big paper bags on a counter, I walked over to see if the guys had, in fact, bought groceries.

  Oh. Yeah, no. Two potholders rested on top of a stack of pots and pans in one bag. The others held silverware and plates and glasses. All right, at least we had this now. Freaking men, though. What about whisks, ladles, measuring cups, spatulas…?

  I opened the drawers and cupboards—all empty.

  “That boy,” Viv said with an eye roll. “I bet they’ve lived on takeout.”

  “I’ll start making a list,” I sighed. It was good that most of the things I needed could be found in a regular grocery store.

  “And I’ll…” Viv eyed the counter by the sink, where the men had had no problem dumping beer bottles and pizza boxes. “I’ll get someone to take the trash out.”

  She left the kitchen, and I slid onto one of the chairs at the island and hauled out a notepad from my purse.

  Closing my eyes, I did a quick headcount of those I’d seen—and those I knew would be here. More people were arriving tomorrow.

  “Hi,” said a shy voice from the doorway.

  It was a little girl. It had to be Autumn, Eric’s niece. She had the same ginger-blond hair and blue eyes as he did, only her hair was long and wavy and gathered in two pigtails.

  “Hi.” I smiled and left my seat. “I’m Emilia, Finnegan’s wife. What’s your name?” I bent down a bit in front of her and planted my hands on my knees.

  She smiled back timidly. “Autumn.”

  “I thought it was you. You’re as adorable as your uncle said.”

  She blushed and ducked her head.

  Sweet girl. Rather than starting third grade in Philadelphia, she was on the run with her family because of…everything. She couldn’t even remember her parents. They’d both been killed in the mayhem years back when John had taken over the syndicate. Autumn had been around a year old.

  “Would you like to help me make a grocery list?” I asked. “I thought we could bake something later.”

  Her eyes lit up. “I like to bake.”

  Perfect. “Me too.”

  An hour and a half later, the hallway was filling up with countless grocery bags. Luna had joined me to help out. Still no sign of Finnegan, but he’d texted me, saying he was doing his best to wrap up downstairs. If it was work, I wasn’t going to disturb him. They had a lot to think about.

  While waiting for the groceries to arrive, Autumn had shown Viv and me around the house. Finnegan and I would share the third floor with Liam, Shan, and Eric and Autumn. Four bedrooms, four baths, the same access to a long balcony with a stunning view of the forest out back. Patrick, Sarah, the twins, and a couple others would occupy the guest rooms on the second floor, Viv and Thomas had snatched up the only bedroom on the first floor, and then I’d learned that the barn outside was more than a barn. It was a guesthouse complete with six bedrooms, a common area, baths, and a freaking bar.

  They’d stocked up the bar before even thinking about the kitchen.

  That was the fucking Irish for ya.

  Patrick was one of the guys who helped me stow away everything in the kitchen, and I asked him where Sarah was.

  He chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck. “She was tired. She’s taking a nap.”

  I checked my watch. Taking a nap at nine in the evening? All right.

  “Never mind.” I smiled and placed four loaves of b
read on the kitchen counter. Everyone had eaten dinner, I’d been told, but I’d learned over the summer that these men liked their midnight snacks. If I prepared something quick, I could relax after that. I’d bought three buckets of fried chicken and plenty of chips, and I’d received no complaints on my sandwiches before.

  I rubbed my forehead. This was going to take some organizational skills. I was feeding twenty-five people for however long we were staying.

  I stiffened when I felt two arms locking around my waist, and the embrace was instantly followed by the familiar scent of Finnegan’s cologne. All the stress, all the tension, everything—it just vanished, and I spun around and threw my arms around his neck.

  He hugged me so hard and lifted me off the ground. “Fuck, how I missed you.”

  “Me too.” I hugged him even harder and buried my face against his neck. “A week was torture.” My chest constricted with emotion.

  He hummed and set me down again, then cupped my cheeks and kissed me hard. “Twenty minutes is torture.”

  I grinned into the kiss and combed my fingers through his hair. He liked that.

  “Have you seen the twins?” I wondered.

  “Mmhmm.” He ended another kiss slowly and told me they were in the basement watching a movie. “I’m only a little offended that you didn’t barge downstairs with them when you got here. They had no fucks to give.”

  I chuckled and smoothed down his vest. He was so handsome. “I have fucks to give, and I know how you guys get when you’re hungry.” I paused. “I may have hidden a bag of snacks just for you.”

  His eyes glowed with approval, something I took way too much pleasure in. “Come on, I wanna introduce you to Liam.” He kissed me once more, a firm, swift kiss, and then took my hand and guided me out of the kitchen. “Liam!”

  We found him with a bunch of others in the living room, and Liam rose from his seat. He was a man I only recognized because I’d seen him in pictures, and seeing him in real life was a bit rattling. He’d just been in prison for manslaughter. He dressed like Finnegan—actually, they had a lot in common. He was almost as tall as Finnegan, they shared the same hell-raising grin, and there was something lethal about them. They looked like brothers more than Finnegan and Patrick did.

  “Liam—my amazing wife, Emilia.” Finnegan kissed the top of my hand before releasing it. “Emilia, the older brother I always wanted.”

  “Fuck you!” Patrick hollered from the hallway.

  I smiled politely as Liam extended his hand, and I shook it. “I’ve heard a lot about you, Liam.”

  “I’m worse than that, darlin’.” He raised my hand to his lips and kissed my knuckles, all while flashing Finnegan a devious smirk. Then he slid his gaze back to mine. “Thank you for taking over the kitchen. We’re bloody useless.”

  “I know you are.” I smirked, half surprised I had the guts to say that.

  “Oh-ho!” Liam cracked up and slapped a hand to Finnegan’s shoulder. My husband was laughing and hugging me to him. “You found a great one, cousin. Be good to her.”

  “Of-fucking-course.” Finnegan kissed the side of my head, then wrapped his hand around mine. “She’s the best part of me.”

  I smiled up at him.

  I knew the expectations were high; he and I both had roles to play that didn’t necessarily reflect who we were, but he never stopped showing his appreciation, or his love, and it made it so much easier to pretend. I had a deep-seated need to be a caregiver, a need Finnegan shared too. But in public, he would let that urge take a back seat so the boss of a crime syndicate could take the wheel. And I would crank up the doting and turn my caregiver into an obedient housewife.

  It was all about image.

  But having seen Grace and Shan pull it off without ever making it seem fake, I had no doubt Finnegan and I would manage to find our own way too.

  The next several days were about settling into the unsettled. I provided the schedule the men actually followed, probably because it revolved around food. Between seven and nine, breakfast could be picked up in the kitchen. I spent those hours popping up toast, preparing eggs—boiled or scrambled—cooking bacon, and making sure the spread of cold cuts, diced fruit, juice, coffee, tea, and jams never ran out on the kitchen island. Luna, Viv, and Sarah helped out here and there, but Autumn turned into my constant companion.

  That early in the day, I didn’t leave the kitchen. Because as soon as the breakfast hours were over, it was time to start preparing lunch. Lunch was the first meal for many of the men who’d worked all night. Soups, salads, lighter casseroles, rolls, omelets, leftovers, wraps, subs—I was quickly exhausting my imagination and would have to turn to the internet soon.

  My life was so exciting…

  At least I had help. Luna was doing her best to study while we were in hiding, and so far, she’d only been forced to drop the classes she couldn’t take online. For lunch and dinner, she was with Autumn and me.

  Between lunch and dinner, I had my much-needed break.

  That was when Finnegan took a break from work, too.

  We changed into workout clothes and headed out back for a warm-up.

  Fall was in the crisp air.

  “This is my favorite time of the day,” I admitted, adjusting my ponytail.

  Finnegan smiled and shouldered his backpack. “Mine too.”

  The backpack meant we’d be doing some fun combat training. It’d become my crack in Washington. Knife throwing, martial arts, target practice, self-defense—I soaked up every minute of it, and I was getting better. Well. I admittedly sucked at target practice. Guns were not my thing. Hand me a knife instead.

  Finnegan had once promised to help me get stronger, and boy, did he take that promise seriously. I loved him for it.

  Liam’s ranch was as big, if not bigger, than our place in Pennsylvania, and Finnegan and I started our jog along the high hedges at the edge of the property line, aiming for the wooded area at the bottom.

  I inhaled deeply, letting the morning disappear.

  “How’s everything going in the basement?” I asked as we picked up the pace a bit. “I’m surprised you haven’t died from smoke inhalation yet.”

  Aside from a handful of them, everyone smoked, and they did it indoors. Though, I’d put my foot down and successfully banned smoking in common areas in the rest of the house because of the kids. They didn’t need to inhale that crap.

  Finnegan chuckled. “Good ventilation, I guess. And it’s going all right. There was a minor bitch fight I’ve gotta settle later, but we’re making progress.”

  I had to tread carefully here. “I don’t suppose you can tell me what the fight was about?”

  He shared little to nothing about anything related to “work.” Sometimes, it bugged me. For the most part, I convinced myself it was for the best. I’d probably just be pissed if I knew everything. Not to mention, scared out of my mind.

  Finnegan smiled ruefully and slowed down as we reached the forest. “It’s about whether or not we’re bringing our women to Europe,” he admitted. “Pop and Uncle T want youse to stay here.”

  Oh. I’d assumed we were all going. Was it weird I was disappointed? I wanted to see Europe. It was what I’d reminded myself of all summer when boredom threatened to steal my sanity; at least we’d be going to Europe soon.

  “Does anyone want us to go?” I asked.

  He nodded once, and we came to a stop near a fallen tree. It was huge and would be a good place to drop our gear. I glanced around us and grimaced. The ground was wet and completely covered in leaves. I wouldn’t be resting around here, that was for sure.

  “Pat, Liam, Kellan, and Eric,” he replied. He removed the backpack and brought out our water bottles. “I’m on the fence, to be honest.”

  I couldn’t hide my disappointment anymore. “Baby, I’m gonna die of boredom if I get stuck here.”

  He cracked a grin and walked over to me, quick to cup my cheeks and kiss my forehead. “And I’d lose my shit if you weren’t
nearby. You’re coming to Europe with us, princess—I promise.”

  “But?” I was definitely sensing a but.

  “But I’m not sure I can let you come all the way to Italy,” he confessed. “We have a safe house in London—”

  I stiffened. “Just how dangerous is this gonna get?”

  He took a step back and scrubbed a hand over his mouth and jaw. “That’s the thing, we don’t know. Hell of a lot more dangerous than our normal gigs, which is why I wanna take all the precautions we can. I ain’t ending up in prison again.”

  I swallowed hard, feeling queasy all of a sudden. Sometimes, I was treated to a cold shower that served as a reminder of how young I was. To this day, I didn’t regret admitting to Finnegan that I wanted Grace and Ian’s murderers dead. I did want them gone. Buried and forgotten. And my husband had been honest; revenge was the big plan. He was going to murder the killers.

  Then…I don’t know, how had I not considered the actions that would lead to the results? Of course it wouldn’t be safe. I was so naïve at times.

  I had to amend my previous wishes. “I want them dead,” I whispered. “But not if it puts you or the others in danger.”

  A soft smile tugged at Finnegan’s mouth, and he touched my cheek. “We can’t have it both ways, princess. But we know the risks.” He gestured up the hill toward the house. “Every fucker on this ranch wants retribution. We’re gonna do our best to find Uncle John, but the Avellinos are going down, regardless.”

  I nodded once and lowered my gaze.

  “Hey.” He stepped closer again and lifted my chin. “We’re gonna be careful. This is just something we have to do. They’re coming for us.”

  He was right. We were in hiding for a reason. “Okay.” I took a deep breath. “Let’s continue my training.”

  He lifted his brows. “Yeah, about that. You know I’m training you for shit you’re never gonna get exposed to, right? I will never put you in danger.”

  Right. Whatever. No, he obviously wouldn’t, but if something were to happen, I wanted to be useful. I’d almost lost my life in a fight against my drunk of a father. Never again. No one would ever get the upper hand again. I refused to be a victim.